I (Melinda) will never forget showing up for my son’s first baseball practice and discovering the coach had quit before the season started. As the moms stood around trying to figure out what to do, one of the dads agreed to come to the rescue. Kathy threw her hands up in the air and shouted, “Thank you, Jesus!” I thought this crazy lady looked vaguely familiar. I soon realized she was my kids’ pediatrician’s wife and soon-to-be new best friend.
The next crazy lady to be recognized was Melinda. My (Kathy) husband said, “You should really get to know Melinda. She is so nice and sweet. She’s Micah’s mom.” I was really thinking, “Great. Just what I need. Some perky, annoyingly sweet woman to talk to all baseball season. Peachy.”
Little did we know that we just “clicked.” As we sweat and sunburned, with Kathy’s then-three-year old son Luke running circles around us, a special friendship was growing. Each baseball practice became like group therapy sessions for two. We realized that mothering our children was difficult, that we really weren’t that crazy, and we had a whole lot in common.
The community we found in each other inspired us to expand our community through blogging, writing and face-to-face ministry with other moms. We wanted everyone to have what we had. Ok, maybe not sunburned shoulders, but friends that would listen, be compassionate and help us solve problems without judgement.
Mothering From Scratch, the blog, was born in May of 2012. Mothering From Scratch, the book, hopefully will be published in the near future. Until then, we plan on sharing our struggles and successes for all moms.
To us, community means…
No woman stays an island. At least not very long. We all crave to be included and acknowledged by our peers. In mothering, we need each other for perspective and encouragement. Isolation is often the breeding ground for self-condemnation and insecurity.
Soundboarding with constructive feedback. We all need someone to listen to us. We all have friends who will join in with our complaining and angst. Only a select few actually offer advice that is godly and useful.
Accountability for one another. Kind of like a mirror without the harsh, hotel lighting. Good community members lovingly illuminate the things that need attention, but don’t put a glaring spotlight on every flaw and imperfection. Not only do we need people to point out where we could use improvement, we also need cheerleaders who help us celebrate with us in our victories and progress — big and small.
One of the biggest barriers to community is sometimes our own pre-conceived ideas of what it should look like and who should be in it. We have to open our minds and hearts, mamas.
Our community might just be the crazy lady on the bleachers.
Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other. Romans 12:9-10 (NLT)