by Chris Carter of The Mom Cafe, Regular MOMtor Contributor
I have come to realize in my almost 46 years of living, that my faith walk isn’t really about me at all.
I always used God as a means to my strength, my peace, my hope, my joy, and my inspiration in this life of selfish sufficiency. He was in my heart, oh yes.
But was my heart truly in His? Was I pursuing true faithfulness?
My faithfulness would ebb and flow through all of life’s circumstances and interference in my plans. I would thank Him for my blessings and question Him in my suffering. I would ignore Him in my prideful distractions and then plead for Grace in my selfish failures. I would seek Him to learn and grow to be a better person. I would pull and push and pull and push, as I needed and through the years, I adjusted my faith in Him accordingly. Oh, how I would use Him in a mighty way for my purpose. It was all about…
Me.
As I come to this deep realization of my faith, I am slowly becoming aware of how misleading my walk has been. He is ever so gently whispering to me and opening my heart to this changing perspective. I see the depths of where my faith must go, and I am humbled at the sight of what true faithfulness actually means.
Its newness is still sticky and salty, as the sweetness of His Grace wraps around my heart. I always thought I was such a faithful soul as I lingered in His Light for years. I just didn’t know that His Power and His Purpose for me, for you, for each and every one of us…
Is all about Him.
Now please be assured that every detail in our lives matter so deeply to Him. Oh, how I have been loved and cared for by my Heavenly Father every day of my life. And I believe He has done the same for YOU. He is faithful to us, in every way. But are we faithful to Him?
If we pause in our busy lives to really delve deep into His Word and His Plan- it might strike you as it did me. There is a much bigger picture than our life stories. Oh, I fear we have lost sight of it. I know I am innocently unaware of the Greatness that is God. But what little I am discovering, leaves me breathless.
Oh, my friends…
It’s so much more than us.
If you believe in a Mighty Majestic God, could you also believe that His Sovereign Divinity is bigger than you? Could you trust that as much as He Loves us, He wants so desperately to have us join in His Purpose?
Faithfulness to me has changed and shifted in a powerful way.
I believed that this very sacred intention was about staying faithful to God through our journey, and trusting in His Plan for us. And it DOES!
But there is another piece to faithfulness:
We are to put Him First.
True faithfulness is living For HIS purpose and staying steady on His course, not ours. His Disciples lived this kind of faithfulness. But are we?
The paradox of this is that I always lived my faith the opposite…
My plan… with my faith in Him.
It’s an innocent take on faith. We are self-centered beings. But the Greater faith lies in this:
His Plan… with His faith in me.
This, my friends is faithfulness.
Does He truly have your faith?
I suppose we all need to ask this imperative question in the quiet of our hearts. As mothers, we might be capable of changing our faith walk and teaching our children about this very truth. And yet with this kind of faithfulness brings many difficult challenges…
Sacrifice.
Selflessness.
Surrender.
All notably about giving of ourselves in a way that is possibly new and uncomfortable at best.
Can we shift our focus in this life to Him? Can we surrender our plans to His Greater Purpose? Can we sacrifice our will to His Will? This type of faith leads us to opening our eyes to the Greatness of His Glory and His Heavenly Plan. Achingly so. I believe I am just touching the sweet surface of His Sovereignty.
Oh, how I hope I can truly be faithful. I pray I can stretch beyond myself to discover His Vision, not mine. And in doing so, the frame that surrounds my life will be set in an entirely new picture.
This post is part of our eight-week series, “Spirited Mom: A Fruity Look at Mothering.” We’re focusing on a different Fruit of the Spirit each week, as it applies to mothering.
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Before having children, Chris Carter worked as a music therapist for several years in Chicago’s inpatient psychiatric hospitals. She also managed creative arts and recreation programming for four group homes. In that time of her life, she learned and grew to know the pain and suffering of so many people. She is now a stay-at-home mom and currently spends her days running kids to and from school four times a day, volunteering and keeping the house in some sort of order! She has a thriving blog, The Mom Cafe, where she regularly shares her mothering experience and wisdom.
It’s like a work-reward program. Like when Jesus asked the follower to drop his fish nets and follow him. Where is the faith? If the faith is there, it opens the path before us not available without that faith – His faith in us.
It’s a big responsibility. We can’t get it right every time, but we can WANT to. And that’s where growth through faith comes.
Reason No. 329 I love Chris Carter: She isn’t perfect. But she’s a perfect example.
Eli@coachdaddy recently posted..Sad Songs Say So Much – the Hopeful Ones Say More
Reason No. 479 I love Eli Pacheco… He always gets ME. You are such a gift, BC. Grinning ear to ear. Always with you. XO
🙂
Chris Carter recently posted..Devotional Diary: A New Day, A New Perspective Psalm 118:24
AFAIC that’s the best answer so far!
Love this: “There is a much bigger picture than our life stories” and this “We are to put Him First” and this “True faithfulness is living For HIS purpose and staying steady on His course, not ours” Oh, how I needed this today. Thank you.
misssrobin recently posted..I Just Can’t Do This Anymore
Oh sweet friend… Perhaps He needed you to read this today, to remind you of His Faith in YOU. Perhaps. His perfect timing always amazes me…
I am so so blessed by your comment. Will be praying for you! XO
Chris Carter recently posted..Devotional Diary: A New Day, A New Perspective Psalm 118:24
So difficult to be selfless, especially when we see what we want and have such a difficult time understanding why God isn’t sending us in that direction. But, it seems like the things that i have understood the least, after some time, I look back and realize why it was good those things happened. Trying my best to live with Him first. Glad I have people like you to keep me pointed in the right direction! 🙂
Alexa (Kat Biggie) recently posted..Labrador American Bulldog Puppy Power
I hear ya Alexis! I have more “selfish days” than “selfless days”- and I keep trying to lift my eyes and thoughts to His Vision- His Purpose- And that humbles me to a point of surrender. Then I begin again! HA! Over and over and over and….
It’s hard to believe that which we cannot see. SO hard.
But that is faith.
Chris Carter recently posted..Faithfulness
Always so insightful Chris. I agree that my faith walk isn’t about me, but about Him. So much can be revealed if we focus on His plan. I just loved your dialogue with the commenter “Considerer” I was bless by your exchange. I agree with her, that you are quite the encourager.
Hope recently posted..The Strength of My Sisters
Oh Hope… I too still think about my dialogue with the “considerer”- I really prayed through how I can respond to her first comment. I love her honesty! I am so blessed by her responses!!! Those are the interactions I love best… 😉
Chris Carter recently posted..Faithfulness
Glad I found you, Chris. Or glad you found me today. You heartened my day with your comment on my blog and also this post. At first it seems hard to wrap my head around it, but a part of me gets it. I have surrendered to my faith (which varies, to be honest) many times in life, and things have worked well.
Tamara recently posted..Feeling The August Things.
I am so excited to connect with you Tamara- and I can’t wait to grow our new friendship!! This faith thing is hard. I think God draws us near when we are ready and willing to lean in and listen. Sometimes… it takes time or a new turn in our life that leads us closer to Him, and then He may reveal more to us in our open-ness.
I love that the times you have surrendered to your faith, it has worked well! 🙂
SO grateful you stopped by! XO
Chris Carter recently posted..Faithfulness
Oh Julie- I just ADORE this comment!!! There is just so much wisdom and insight in it…
You are amazing. Would you write a guest post for me in my Devotional Diary Series? Oh, how wonderful it would be to have you share your powerful voice on my site!! Think about it and let me know… 🙂
Chris Carter recently posted..Faithfulness
Being selfless all the time is a hard thing. I have to admit I’m not too successful at it. I need to be better. As always, you make us really think!
Michelle recently posted..Lasting Friendships from the Soccer Field…Time Will Tell
Yes- it’s our human nature to live and think and dream and act for ourselves and our purpose!! I am hoping I can pull myself away from MYSELF more and lend myself to Him. It’s all about faith.
Thanks so much for reading and commenting Michelle!!!
I think of you as being one of the most selfless people I know. You give so much to the people around you – so, so much. I think you are definitely working within the “big plan” versus your plan. And we are all so lucky to have you and to benefit from your words.
Ilene recently posted..Faster
Oh thank you SO much Ilene!!! Your encouragement means the WORLD to me…
Truly.
I do pray I am working within the “big plan”. Oh how I pray!!!
XOXOXOXOXOXOXO… and then some!!!
Chris Carter recently posted..Faithfulness
“I would thank Him for my blessings and question Him in my suffering. I would ignore Him in my prideful distractions and then plead for Grace in my selfish failures. I would seek Him to learn and grow to be a better person.” Yes. Exactly this. This is what I do and I need to make it less about me and more about Him. As always, truly inspiring.
AnnMarie recently posted..In an Instant
Oh we are in it together AnnMarie!!! “More about Him and less about me”- perfectly summed up!!!
It is so hard- especially as a mom… to trust in this kind of faith. You know I am ALWAYS praying for you!!!
Chris Carter recently posted..Faithfulness
Beautiful thougths and words, Chris. I ask to do God’s will every day, as long as it fits into my picture of things. Not exactly surrender, is it? Good thing God meets me where I’m at! 😉
Mary @ A Teachable Mom recently posted..Souvenirs For Everyone
Oh how I know this Mary!!!! Every stinkin’ day!! Oh yes- God’s Grace is a mighty thing, isn’t it? I don’t think we know the half of it, when it comes to His incredible Plan for all of His Children and His Kingdom.
We are all too busy living our lives oblivious to it all.
But He meets us where we are at… so glad He does. 🙂
Chris Carter recently posted..Faithfulness
It’s so hard to be completely faithful, isn’t it? Being selfless and surrendering to something higher than ourselves just seems overwhelming at times. I know that when I have faith, things work themselves out. I just keep reminding myself of that. And you, Chris, have reminded me of that as well. Thank you!
another jennifer recently posted..A Vacation Haiku
It’s in our nature to be selfish- and how I have to really put effort in pulling out of that world to set my eyes on Him. He’s SO much bigger than us…
I don’t think we get the Power of knowing our Creator as much as our little ol’ brains can allow.
When I really truly dwell on it… it is terrifyingly beautiful. 🙂
Chris Carter recently posted..Faithfulness
So interesting and I know just what you mean…I have found myself at times feeling very selfish with my faith…asking a lot of “why me” or “why not me” questions…but it isn’t about me at all. Great post Chris.-Ashley
thedoseofreality recently posted..Racism For Ratings: Big Brother 15
It’s so so hard to let ourselves go and let God take over!!! Oh how we all naturally live and breath selfishly- it’s human nature!
I am convicted that there is so much more to what our lives are about… and that changes my perspective tremendously.
I don’t think I even know the half of it! But what little flickers of truth I am beginning to realize are quite honestly- out of this world!! He is just so much bigger than us! And so is His Plan…
Chris Carter recently posted..Faithfulness
Not sure I can get past the imagery of new faith being ‘sticky and salty’. I’m afraid my brain’s far too unholy for that! Sorry.
Have a very quick line in the sand and let’s begin again 😉
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Considerer recently posted..How full is your super-hero-o-meter?
Oh Lizzi! I love your honesty. Your brain is NOT too unholy- nor is mine. Anyone who has the love of God is Holy- but I tell ya… my thoughts and actions are often UNholy!!! So with that my friend, we can be UN holy together!!
Looking at my faith journey has been a reflection of selfish motives… I am now realizing that I need to focus on God’s Purpose and not mine. In the end- it truly will be sweet!! Because God has more than we could ever hope or dream for… He knows every single desire in our hearts. He formed us in our mother’s womb and has counted the very hairs on our head! It’s to me, about realizing that He wants to us to trust that. And yes- that can be sticky and salty indeed.
Chris Carter recently posted..Faithfulness
I feel as though much of that I know on a visceral level but not an intellectual one. Or perhaps the other way around. It’s so hard sometimes to remember that He’s there, waiting to be asked before He pours out Good Gifts – that He DESIRES that we ask.
And as for purpose…I still don’t know. I’m trying in ways to see where He’s working, and join in with it, rather than forge my own way at the moment. But He seems to be using my writing, too, to reach out and connect with others over certain issues. Which I love – I love being that tool.
Considerer recently posted..Right now, yesterday, when life will be twisted
I believe every single word of your response is what each and EVERY one of us live every single day, dear friend!!
OH my gosh how I love your words… they resonate with me and so many.
From broken hearts, comes new passion and purpose- if we let Him “pour out Good Gifts”.
“He DESIRES that we ask.” “He DESIRES that we ask.” There is your mantra!!! 🙂
Now- I will read your comment five more times. That’s just how much I love it. Your genuineness is beautiful.
Chris Carter recently posted..Faithfulness
Lol. You are SUCH the encourager – an amazing gift you’ve been blessed with. Thank you, my friend 🙂
Considerer recently posted..Right now, yesterday, when life will be twisted
Oh Chris…you did it again girl! You made us put that mirror in front of ourselves and take a look at who we really are and what we’re actually doing! Thank.you.so.much! Proverbs 20:6 says …”most men will proclaim each his own goodness, but who can find a faithful man?”. I do believe God blessed Abraham so, not only because he had faith that God would do as He promised, but also because God could count on him to get the job done…as with all of our great examples in the Word. We(the Body of Christ) have gotten so far away from that! Thanks again for the great reminder my friend! Have a blessed week! xoxo
Michell recently posted..Dear mom…
Thanks SO much Michell!! I always love love love your encouragement, because I honor your wisdom in Him!!! I love the example you shared with Abraham- AMEN lady!!! Do you do speaking engagements? Seriously- I could totally see you doing that. 😉 You would ROCK the ROOM!!!
Chris Carter recently posted..Faithfulness
Beautifully written and laid out, Chris.
I hit this very soul-awakening moment as I was struggling with yet another less than fulfilling job.
These three things you mention—Sacrifice, Selflessness, Surrender—sound so incredibly hard, but life actually gets easier when you are following and trusting in God’s plan and path.
Kim recently posted..How to duck when life throws a punch
Thank you SO much Kim!! I absolutely agree- when you start to let go of yourself and truly allow God to lead… a newfound peace comes sneaking in your life. There is liberation in surrendering to His Plan!!
Chris Carter recently posted..Faithfulness
I had to read your post twice. My mind was wondering elsewhere as I read it the first time. But when I adjusted my focus to what I was reading, it helped me to understand what you wrote. And its also the same in life our focus is not clearly on God and we tend to get distracted and seek our own plans instead of being faithful to God’s plan. Wonderful post.
Oh I love how you used that analogy Rosario!! It couldn’t be more perfect in reflecting how we all- ALL live our lives so very often…
I just love your words- they compel me to try harder. I will read them again and again. Thank you!
One more time: “our focus is not clearly on God and we tend to get distracted and seek our own plans instead of being faithful to God’s Plan”.
SO beautifully put, my friend. 🙂
Chris Carter recently posted..Faithfulness
Beautifully put and so true! It comes down to trust. God is always asking, “Do you trust Me?” and holding out His hand, waiting for us to grab hold and let go of whatever it is we are holding onto instead. That step of faith, that trust…That’s the hardest. The next steps are eye-opening, amazing, awe-inspiring, as up the mountain we go to new heights of knowing God and what He has for us.
I have often said that becoming a parent has helped me understand the mind of God more, and I think it is true in this way. We set limits for our kids and ask them to do things certain ways, not because we are being selfish or don’t want them to have fun, but because we love them and want so much more for them than they can even imagine! We want their lives to be void of the mistakes and pain we’ve seen in other lives or experienced ourselves. They may think it is all about what we want, but they don’t realize it is about what we want for them. Those last 2 words make all the difference in the world! How much more does God want for His children? And He has perfect, self-less motives! It is mind-blowing.
Great article, Chris! You blessed and challenged my heart!
Julie Moore recently posted..Dad’s Chocolate Chip Cookies (Milk, Soy, Nut and Fish-Free, Can Be Wheat and Egg-Free)
Oh Julie- I just ADORE this comment!!! There is just so much wisdom and insight in it…
You are amazing. Would you write a guest post for me in my Devotional Diary Series? Oh, how wonderful it would be to have you share your powerful voice on my site!! Think about it and let me know… 🙂
Chris Carter recently posted..Faithfulness
I’d love to Chris! Thank you for asking me. 🙂 Send me an email and let me know what you had in mind. naturalandfreeinfo (at) gmail (dot) com
Julie Moore recently posted..Dad’s Chocolate Chip Cookies (Milk, Soy, Nut and Fish-Free, Can Be Wheat and Egg-Free)